A Spouse/Partner Perspective on Being In A Relationship With Camgirl – Guest Blog – PART 1 – Trust & Communication

Okay ladies (and curious men), I brought my husband in to do a guest blog post for us. I thought it would be really nice to bring into view how being a camgirl MAY (everyone’s situation is different!) affect your partner and your relationship with your partner from their perspective.

This is HIS perspective and we have a very unique relationship which allows for us to enjoy the fruits of my (and his!) open mindedness and willingness to share intimate parts of myself with others to help secure a good future for the both of us moving forward.

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Part 1 

Trust

So, your wife, and or girlfriend, wants to be a cam model, eh?

Well, it’s not a bad deal at all…if you as a spouse are prepared for it.
My wife is a cam model. I know what you’re thinking; how can I let thousands of men and women look at my wife in the most intimate of ways? It’s easy…trust. But, there are some things you should know about being a husband, wife, boyfriend or girlfriend of someone in this industry.
First off, if you are the type of partner that has to check your partners phone, emails, letters from home, whatever, then this is not something that is going to sit well with you and you should make your feelings known. Basically, if you’re not okay with thousands of people seeing your partner buck naked with dildos and lube flying all around the room right from the get-go, it’s not going to get better for you or your feelings about it.
If you are at ease right from the start but only have a little hesitance about how all this works (this is normal), you’re probably going to be just fine with your spouse bouncing on fake dong’s all day for cash. If you can be at ease, which I am, about the love of your life sharing herself with the rest of the world, it can be quite the lucrative adventure for the both of you. It just requires you to get out of your own way and let the money come rolling in. Let’s put it this way. I’m married to a top cam model. We have a bad month if she, say, makes 6 grand for that month of work.
Camgirl, relationship, trust
When she first started doing camming, I was curious as to how this worked and what could be made income wise from it. I was also worried about her safety as well. So when my wife first started this whole thing, I used to sit in the room with her just out of cameras view, sipping on a cold beer while I heard thousands of men carry on a conversation about how bad they wanted to fuck her. I watched her do what she does with me privately on a more amplified level of display. I used to laugh to myself, and with her, about how if that guy that just took her private only knew that her husband was sitting behind the laptop flipping through a magazine while drinking a beer.
After awhile, and after I knew how careful my wife is with our safety earning an income in this field, as well as after I realized how this all worked, I quit going into the room with her. Now the only clue for me to know that she is having a good income day is when I hear moaning and movement coming out of her cam room every five seconds. It’s the sweet sound of the savings account growing a little fatter.
As I mentioned above, trust is the key foundation, just like any relationship for any way of life is, that the two of you must have before venturing into this endeavor. Trust me when I say that your camming partner will see better looking options while camming than you. You must learn to accept that.
She will get hundreds of offers to meet up or even get paid thousands of dollars to just hang out with other men. You have to trust your partner to have her, and your, best interests at heart when these offers are made to her. IT WILL HAPPEN. My wife doesn’t meet any of these men or women. Most cam models do not either. Hopefully, your partner isn’t one of the few that take it outside of the camming world behind your back. That’s why rock sold trust is key here.
Trust, True Love, Camgirl, relationship
Communication

My wife and I have very good communication. That in itself creates more trust. She will tell me about every offer that she gets to meet, which guys and girls ACTUALLY turn her on (Yes fella’s, most of you couldn’t turn on a light switch. Remember, my wife gets paid to tell you that you’re a sex God), she tells me about the mild and disgusting requests she gets, and so on. She doesn’t hold back when she starts to tell me about her day.

Just so you know, I do not ask. I do not brow beat her about anything. My wife freely talks about her day just like most of us do that work in office’s or wherever. My wife camming and her talking about her day doing it have become so normal to me now that it’s no different if she was a plumber or something. You too will get that way if you have trust, real trust, between the two of you.

Effective Communication, relationship, camgirl, cam model
As I mentioned above, again, how can my wife and I allow her to be so exposed to people in the most intimate of ways? Besides trust, the first time my wife cammed it was a Sunday Afternoon. The first hour she cammed, she made one hundred and fifty bucks. This is when I started to notice that this was a legitimate way to earn an income. A damn good one too. I just had to step aside and let her do her thing. When I get home from work each day, my wife out earns me, on shorter shifts, usually 3-4 to 1. All it took was for us to trust one another and the rest has been taking care of itself ever since.
I will have more parts to discuss on this topic coming soon. Like how it affects your sex life and social life, along with some other things that you should be aware of before getting involved in this career path as a partner. Until next time!
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I hope you enjoyed reading my husbands perspective! I know I did but I’m biased LOL! I look forward to his other posts 🙂
It’s very important to provide an outside perspective because camming does and will effect your relationships. You may think going into camming that it shouldn’t have much of an impact but it does. I agree with him 100% about trust and good communication being essential. Those traits are essential to every relationship, however need to be fully present and consistent moreso when a couple has a partner that is a camgirl/cam model (or any type of sex worker!)!

 

Camgirl Myth – All Camgirls Are All Sluts

Oh boy, this is going to be a fun post, lol! This myth needs to be addressed for many reasons because I think this is a huge misconception about camgirls that needs to be addressed.

Are we more free with our bodies than a good majority of other people? Yes. I have absolutely no problem sharing my body visually with another human for stimulation purposes and being monetarily compensated for it. I’ve been a stripper AND a camgirl. I prefer being a camgirl because I really don’t enjoy having some gross drunk slob breathing all over me and trying to bite my nipples off. Or the frat boy that keeps trying to take me home so he can “fuck the tits off” of me. I just don’t enjoy being groped and fondled for 8+ hours. But, that’s just me. I hate people, lol. Especially when they can touch me!

For those of you women that do strip/escort I have nothing but respect for you! You put up with WAY more shit than I do! At least when I get tired of their shit I just log off and go soak in my tub or pet my cat.

Yes, as a camgirl more of you is exposed and you are being watched by an unknown number of people as you grope and fondle yourself into an explosive orgasm. I prefer this. Maybe it’s because I don’t like to be touched (with the exception of one special man). Maybe it’s because I REALLY like the money too 🙂 Maybe it’s because I have no fucks left to give. LOL. Either way, there is nothing wrong with being an exhibitionist. Absolutely nothing. Especially if it helps you get your bills paid and look forward to an early retirement!

Fuck yes!

All camgirls hook up with their customers or escort on the side. Um, yeah, wrong! I won’t speak for ALL camgirls of course – I am aware there are some that actually do and I don’t judge! Your hustle is your hustle! Get that money honey! BUT, there are a pretty good majority of us that are married, have life partners or are even *gasp* CELIBATE!

All camgirls have an insatiable sex drive. Ahem. Some of us may have more of a sex drive than most but honestly, by the end of a cam shift the very last thing I want to do is think about, talk about or have sex. I’m worn out! My drive to stuff my bank account full is stronger than my sex drive. Sure, I enjoy my time on cam and have great and often multiple orgasms but I am by no means insatiable 🙂

Me after a long cam shift…

We are all cheaters. This is far from the truth. Those of us that are involved in trusting relationships with our partners do not use this as a means to cheat. Some do and thats their prerogative but you cannot lump us all into the same pile. I am happily married and have no desire to be with anyone other than my husband.

But aren’t you helping other people to “cheat” on their partners?! That’s all about perspective. If someone is jerking off to me on cam while his wife is at work, it has nothing to do with me, and everything to do with him. If it wasn’t me he would just find another model or watch porn. I’m fine with my lights being on because he needs a quick wank. Also, basic male psychology – men are visual and crave variety. It doesn’t mean he doesn’t love his GF/Wife, it’s just visually stimulating for him and makes him feel good.

There is nothing wrong with being sexually open minded. Nothing! That doesn’t make somebody a “slut”. In my book, there is no such thing as a slut, just people who aren’t open about their sexuality judging those of us who are 🙂

Camming Is Not As Easy As It Looks – Camgirl Myths – Laziness

I know that people who look at cam models may think that this shit is easy. We are lazy money hungry (well duh! who doesn’t love money?!) sluts who lay in bed all day and play with our pussies because we are too stupid to do anything else. I’m going to put that to rest right fucking now.

MYTH – Cammodels are lazy. I’m not saying this isn’t true for all cam models, I have seen some LAZY girls on cam. I’ve seen girls sleep, play on their phones all day, watch tv, etc…. But, the majority of the top models on the sites are far from lazy. We work our fucking asses off. We work long shifts doing very physical activity when we are in private. Free chat is where we relax or at least try to. LOL. This is a very physically and mentally draining job. Yeah guys, it’s a fucking job to us. We do this to pay our bills. Get over it.

Physically – Cam modeling can be quite physically taxing. Yeah, it’s not landscaping or construction work but it is physically demanding. If you think I am full of shit, masturbate for 45 minutes solid (furious masturbation – not this casually stroking and sitting on your ass stuff). Then spend 10 minutes talking to people you don’t really want to talk to, then masturbate another 15 minutes in 2-3 different positions, talk for 5-10 and repeat ad nauseam with a permanent plastic smile slapped on your face. Do this for 18 hours one day and consider that you have had a good day and spent a cumulative 10-12 hours of that masturbating. I guarantee you by the end of the day you are going to feel muscles you didn’t even know you had and the only thing that sounds good is a hot bath and your soft bed.

Basically you fuck all day. After you fuck your husband/boyfriend for 4 hours, your body is tired and your pussy is sore. This is no different. And you feel it the next day too when you go down the hall to your fuck palace and log in to do it all over again because you have bills to pay.

I have had cam cuties come in early in my shift, have me ride a dildo for 45 minutes and I am so worn out I almost have to call it a day.  Maybe I’m doing it wrong, but I’m not really sure how to ride a cock like a madwoman (I provide quality services! haha!) for 45 minutes and not feel it in my thighs.

After “ride me bb”. For. 45. Fucking. Minutes.

Mentally – Mentally being a cam model can be so fucking draining at the end of the day that I just want to pour myself on the couch and not talk to anyone about anything. I want to watch mindless tv and eat gummy worms until I pass out.

Camming is (if your doing it right) a sales job and you have to strategize! I spend my whole day learning what makes my cuties tick and using it to my advantage. I spend my day coming up with dirty talk and scenarios on the fly because I am constantly being exposed to new fetishes and ways of doing things. I spend my day navigating freeloaders and learning to uncover new manipulation tactics that these guys use and outsmarting them. I spend my day trying to figure out how to get them to spend more and stay in private longer.

Aside from the sales/strategy game I play, I spend all day socially interacting with people. I am a highly sensitive introvert so this is extremely draining for me. I hate people. I hate talking. Maybe not the best career choice for my particular personality type however it is lucrative so I take one for the team and my bank account and paid off loans thank me for it.

Not all of the conversations are draining, I have had some very interesting and entertaining conversations with some of these men. I know I rant a lot about freeloaders/douchebags but you will have some intelligent, kind and interesting men to talk to, I promise. Those are the guys that make your day better.

However, having to be “on” all of the time can be draining. Please remember to take the time to care for your mental state while you are a cammodel. It’s crucial to your success. Know when you are done for the day mentally and cut your losses. You won’t provide a good experience for your cuties if you are burnt out. You will lose customers if you push yourself too hard. I have experienced this a few times, firsthand and now only log on when I am in a good mood and feeling energetic mentally. My earnings reflect this 🙂

Emotionally – You will experience emotional fatigue as a cam model. How so you ask? When you have all of these men telling you are beautiful/sexy/etc… Blah, blah, blah… You would think that would be energizing but it’s draining because you know that 90% of them are full of shit and say that to all the girls.

You will be trolled/verbally abused. This is a given. You can be the most beautiful and most kindhearted cammodel on the internet and someone will talk shit to you and try to knock you down. Especially if you are beautiful and kind. Men will talk down to you and will treat you like complete and utter shit. Expect this and learn how to block it out – or just troll them back! I find the ban hammer a wonderful tool for eliminating these guys. Just know that once you get rid of one, another is waiting in line. This is no different than working at a hospital and seeing blood. It comes with the territory, you just have to learn how to not let it get to you. Raging bitch on wheels? This won’t phase you at all 🙂

You will hear things/see things that will traumatize you. I once had a man turn on his cam when I had about 300 people in my chat room and he started slicing his hard cock with a razor blade. Not kidding. He was cutting deep and drawing blood. I was absolutely mortified and had to retain my composure in front of the other men in the room. I banned him and emailed support to let them know what he was up to. All with a smile on my face.

You will have pedophiles, you will receive death threats. You will have people tell you things JUST to watch your reaction. DON’T FEED THE TROLLS!

Overall, I do enjoy camming even though this post sounded like a rant most likely, it is the truth! Camming can be very enjoyable, and taxing. If you want to just lay around lazily and not talk to these guys, not give an amazing performance every time they click the private button and just expect them to throw money at you for just sitting there with your phone in your face you will short change yourself financially and are just wasting your time. Do it right, and you will be rewarded!